HTBAPB

Someone just emailed this to me and it made my day.

Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement -- not even her
parent's nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear
and would be the best dressed mother- of-the-bride ever! A week later,
Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new young wife had
bought the exact same dress! Jennifer asked her to exchange it, but she
refused. 'Absolutely not, I look like a million bucks in this dress and
I'm wearing it,' she replied.



Jennifer told her mother who graciously said, 'Never mind sweetheart. I'll get another dress. After all, it's
your special day.'


A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress. When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, 'Aren't you going to return the other dress? You
really don't have another occasion where you could wear it.'



Her mother just smiled and replied, 'Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night
before the wedding.'

NOW I ASK YOU - IS THERE A WOMAN OUT THERE, ANYWHERE, WHO WOULDN'T ENJOY THIS STORY? SEND IT TO EVERY
WOMAN YOU KNOW!!!


(HTBAPB - HOW TO BE A PERFECT BITCH!!)

A bat in the house

I am a sorority house mom. The job creates loads of interesting and completely ridiculous stories, this is one of them:

So I find out yesterday that we have a bat in the house. A bat that has been there since FRIDAY and no one told me. Seriously, how hard is it for 1 girl to call me and tell me something. There are 27 of them! 1 of them could have called me.

I called humane animal removal to come get the thing and while I'm waiting I find it hiding in the living room. Some of the girls don't care, but most of the girls proceed to freak out at the very mention of the word, BAT. So I hang out and make sure no one tries to catch the little buggar themselves.

Eventually the pest guy shows up and the girls start refering to him as batman almost immediately. He's shy and young and I think the very prescence of 27 odd screaming girls is kind of freaking him out, but he hides it well.

7 of the girls decide they want to stay and watch him catch the bat because they've never seen a bat up close. I agree mainly because I'm a big fan of animal education, and they should learn that bats aren't dangerous creatures.

The next 3 minutes of my life are something out of a movie. The guy goes to grab the bat and it takes off and starts flying around the room. Screams erupt immediately and all 7 girls hit the floor like shots had been fired. 2 of them actually dove to the ground. He finally catches it and they all gather around with exclamations of "it's so small!" "it's just a baby!" "he's so cute!"

So if I let him go again would you still think he was cute?

Anyway we let him go outside and he flew away.

Moral of the this story: IF YOU LEAVE THE FRONT DOOR PROP OPEN WE WILL GET UNINVITED VISITORS

This is why I worship at the Temple of Ambition

90210

Oh new 90210 how I love thee, let me count that ways,

1. Nat

2. Brenda

3. Kelly

4. gross abuse of money

5. toothpick thin girls

6. underage drinking

and

the THE DRAMA has begun already.

I'm back..

...after a brief foray into internet dating. I hate internet dating.